Half Man Half Biscuit Half Hearted

Half Man Half Biscuit Half Hearted

Ah yes. Why spend time typing up the lyrics to Half Man Half Biscuit songs? Because they are gems like no other. We celebrate British bands and artists for seminal musical works (think Bowie or Elvis Costello) and, unless you happen to know the late John Peel's inside leg measurement or you were enlightened as a student, the majesty, wit and sheer intelligence of the HMHB opus is ignored. Shame, shame, shame.


Over the years a number of web sites have recorded some lyrics and a multitude of research notes for the songs [see the excellent www.hmhb.co.uk]. The latter are invaluable to understanding the wide ranging and often obscure historical references. The former are a mixed bag, with only a few songs listed.


So what started out as a full hearted attempt by me to record the lyrics so my sister could understand the songs has developed into a blog post and a project to educate the half-hearted masses and to provide a definitive song list with lyrics.

They'll be other crap on here too such as my own songs "Progressive Dads", "People called Wilson", "Blog-proof iPod", "Armchair Expert" and "Holistically Challenged"- I need to finish writing them first :)

"...Baby I'm from the Wirral Peninsula.
A merciless despot with nothing to lose"

Monkey Man, June 2007

Please note that all lyrics are mostly my interpretation and are presented here to assist you in understanding the songs. They are the copyright of others.

You should also pay a visit to www.chrisrand.com/hmhb/ for HMHB lyrics - a superb site with a superb range of listings

Saturday 6 October 2007

God Gave Us Life [Back in the D.H.S.S.]

What did God give us, Neil?
God gave us life, Nigel
Sure did.

A one two three four, John the Baptist knows the score

God gave us life (x4)

So that we could all play with our mates in the street
With the ball that we bought from the shop just last week

God gave us life (x4)

So that we could take sweets off strange men in big cars
And get driven to the woods to stroke non-existent puppies

And he also gave us Una Stubbs
And he also gave us Little & Large
And he also gave us Keith Harris
And he also gave us Wendy Craig
And he also gave us Thora Hird
And he also gave us Matthew Kelly
And he also gave us Eartha Kitt
And he also gave us Lionel Blair

God gave us life (x4)

God gave us life – hallelujah (x4)

God gave us life – Pontius Pilate

God gave us life – Bobby Charlton

God gave us life – Gordon Jackson

God gave us life – have a banana

God gave us life


Notes taken from www.hmhb.co.uk

John the Baptist
Jordan dipper, splashed Our Lord, head chopped of on Salome's behest.
Una Stubbs Actress, Alf Garnett's daughter (Rita), appeared as captain on "Give Us A Clue".
Little & Large Seriously unfunny comedy duo who once got Kevin Keegan to sing to millions. Bastards.
Keith Harris Mediocre ventriloquist, had a hit with "Orville's Song".
Wendy Craig Star of "Butterflies", Carla Lane abomination sitcom.
Thora Hird Actress and presenter of "Songs of Praise".
Mathew Kelly Presenter of "Game For A Laugh" Has moved on to other crimes against humanity.
Eartha Kitt Singer, also starred as Catwoman in the 60's spoof Batman series.
Isla St.Clair On The Generation Game with Larry Grayson, other things as well.
Lionel Blair Dancer. Led the opposing team to Una on "Give Us a Clue".
Live versions have a few other celebrities appearing, Ross King and Dani Behr being favourites.
Pontius Pilate Not JC's best mate.
Bobby Charlton Man U and England footy star of the 60's.
Gordon Jackson Late actor, starred in "Upstairs Downstairs" and "The Professionals".

MM adds:

Ahhhh, the very first HMHB song I heard. They aren't tears in my eyes, oh no.


1 comment:

Unknown said...

Thanks Eric.

I appreciate your trouble. And share your appreciation.

Geoff