Half Man Half Biscuit Half Hearted: Reasons to be Miserable (Part 10) [ACD]

Half Man Half Biscuit Half Hearted

Ah yes. Why spend time typing up the lyrics to Half Man Half Biscuit songs? Because they are gems like no other. We celebrate British bands and artists for seminal musical works (think Bowie or Elvis Costello) and, unless you happen to know the late John Peel's inside leg measurement or you were enlightened as a student, the majesty, wit and sheer intelligence of the HMHB opus is ignored. Shame, shame, shame.

Over the years a number of web sites have recorded some lyrics and a multitude of research notes for the songs [see the excellent www.hmhb.co.uk]. The latter are invaluable to understanding the wide ranging and often obscure historical references. The former are a mixed bag, with only a few songs listed.

So what started out as a full hearted attempt by me to record the lyrics so my sister could understand the songs has developed into a blog post and a project to educate the half-hearted masses and to provide a definitive song list with lyrics.

They'll be other crap on here too such as my own songs "Progressive Dads", "People called Wilson", "Blog-proof iPod", "Armchair Expert" and "Holistically Challenged"- I need to finish writing them first :)

"...Baby I'm from the Wirral Peninsula.
A merciless despot with nothing to lose"

Monkey Man, June 2007

Please note that all lyrics are mostly my interpretation and are presented here to assist you in understanding the songs. They are the copyright of others.

You should also pay a visit to www.chrisrand.com/hmhb/ for HMHB lyrics - a superb site with a superb range of listings

Tuesday, 18 March 2008

Reasons to be Miserable (Part 10) [ACD]

A fairly attractive girl walks past a building site and from underneath an industrial safety helmet you hear…. … ta Neil!
And you stand there witnessing the whole Neanderthal situation, wanting to twist your own brain out as they sit satisfied on their newly-built wall, laughing their hods off.
Cringe!

Reasons to be miserable, another good excuse to be dead
It’s one more thing to gripe about as I while away my days in bed

And there’s the person who collects all things Pierrot and loves Siamese cats and thinks they’re sophisticated ‘cos they eat Fry’s Chocolate Cream
And they’d do anything to spend the night with that fella off the Turkish Delight advert who’s full of Eastern monosodium glutamate

And they always have a portrait of a sad clown on the wall and they go to charity shops and tend to become slightly orgasmic at the thought of vampire lust.
Cringe!

Reasons to be miserable, another good excuse to be dead
It’s one more thing to gripe about as I while away my days in bed
Reasons to be miserable, another good excuse to be dead
It’s one more thing to gripe about as I while away the days in bed

And I don’t know anyone who puts peaches on their cornflakes either!

Notes taken from www.hmhb.co.uk

Title parodies "Reasons to be Cheerful, Part 3" by Ian Dury and the Blockheads.
Pierrot Pale & sad French clown, teardrop on cheek etc. Cultural reference stolen from the Italian Commedia dell'Arte genre of the 17th Century and turned into something saddoes wank off over at Athena.
Fry's Chocolate Cream/Turkish Delight Chocolates, adverts in desert, Rudolf Valentino style.
peaches on their cornflakes a less than gentle dig at some fruity serving suggestions on Kellogg's packets.

Half Man Half Biscuit
Half Hearted