Corgi Registered Friends [Achtung Bono]

In the kingdom of the blind
It's said the one-eyed man is king
And in the kingdom of the bland
It's nine o'clock on ITV

I believe I've seen holograms
With more substance than you
Automatic doors don't open for you

"C" "O" "R" "G" "I"
Corgi registered friends
"C" "O" "R" "G" "I"
Corgi registered friends
Meet up on a Monday with your
Corgi registered friends

You call Glastonbury Glasto
You'd like to go there one day
When they've put up the gun towers
To keep the hippies away

December sees Kitzbuhel
Clad in Low Alpine
Your children are painfully souless
Ralph's in Brize Norton

"C" "O" "R" "G" "I"
Corgi registered friends
"C" "O" "R" "G" "I"
Corgi registered friends
You do your Del Boy impressions with your
Corgi registered friends

For sale gym equipment
And now your jeans are too tight
Amanda Burton on auto pilot
Is all you need each night

I wear a tolerance robe
I have the patience of Job
But when I hear of your wife's silling giggling
At Ann Summers parties

"C" "O" "R" "G" "I"
Corgi registered friends
"C" "O" "R" "G" "I"
Corgi registered friends
You got to medieval banquets with your
Corgi registered friends

Stick this in your Volvo glove compartment


Notes taken from www.hmhb.co.uk

CORGI Council for Registered Gas Installers, the national watchdog for gas safety in the United Kingdom.
"In the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is king." is a quote from the 15th century philosopher Erasmus. Or in other words, if all else around you were ignorant than even a little knowledge would make you significant in that community.
Kitzbühel Skiing (and golfing) location in the Alps.
Lowe Alpine make walking gear.
Brize Norton RAF base in Oxfordshire, between Witney and Carterton.
Del Boy Mr Jason's character from Only Fools And Horses.
Amanda Burton Dr Sam Ryan in Silent Witness these days, but forever Heather Haversham/Huntingdon/Black in Brookside in the mid-eighties to me.
Job Another chap with a Book in the Old Testament (there's a joke here somewhere about the Book of Jobs). Basically, Job loses his family, his wealth, and his health. Job's three friends, Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar, come to comfort him and to discuss his crushing series of tragedies. They insist his suffering is punishment for sin in his life. Job, though, remains devoted to God through all of this and contends that his life has not been one of sin. A fourth man, Elihu, tells Job he needs to humble himself and submit to God's use of trials to purify his life. Finally, Job questions God Himself and learns valuable lessons about the sovereignty of God and his need to totally trust in the Lord. Job is then restored to health, happiness and prosperity beyond his earlier state. I'd have stayed in the pub meself.
Ann Summers Sex toys and the rest.