Half Man Half Biscuit Half Hearted: Bob Wilson, Anchorman [Editor's Recommendation]

Half Man Half Biscuit Half Hearted

Ah yes. Why spend time typing up the lyrics to Half Man Half Biscuit songs? Because they are gems like no other. We celebrate British bands and artists for seminal musical works (think Bowie or Elvis Costello) and, unless you happen to know the late John Peel's inside leg measurement or you were enlightened as a student, the majesty, wit and sheer intelligence of the HMHB opus is ignored. Shame, shame, shame.

Over the years a number of web sites have recorded some lyrics and a multitude of research notes for the songs [see the excellent www.hmhb.co.uk]. The latter are invaluable to understanding the wide ranging and often obscure historical references. The former are a mixed bag, with only a few songs listed.

So what started out as a full hearted attempt by me to record the lyrics so my sister could understand the songs has developed into a blog post and a project to educate the half-hearted masses and to provide a definitive song list with lyrics.

They'll be other crap on here too such as my own songs "Progressive Dads", "People called Wilson", "Blog-proof iPod", "Armchair Expert" and "Holistically Challenged"- I need to finish writing them first :)

"...Baby I'm from the Wirral Peninsula.
A merciless despot with nothing to lose"

Monkey Man, June 2007

Please note that all lyrics are mostly my interpretation and are presented here to assist you in understanding the songs. They are the copyright of others.

You should also pay a visit to www.chrisrand.com/hmhb/ for HMHB lyrics - a superb site with a superb range of listings

Wednesday 20 June 2007

Bob Wilson, Anchorman [Editor's Recommendation]

Lord I’ve tried the best I can
I’ve asked everybody in Kazakhstan
But I still don’t understand
Bob Wilson, anchorman

I’ve been to Kent, Gwent and Senegal
I even went to look for Jim Rosenthal
I found him on his knees at the Wailing Wall crying
Bob Wilson, anchorman

Well I marvel at the things we find beneath the ground
That man can go faster than the speed of sound
But I still can’t get my head around
Bob Wilson, anchorman

I’m cold and I’m hungry and I’m in Dundalk
I’ve got no bus fare and I’ve got to walk
It’s raining soup and I’ve got a fork
Where be my Camper Van?

Well I’d like to meet Stephenson the Engineer
And I’d like to meet Faraday and buy him a beer
And I’d love to meet the bloke who had the bright idea of
Bob Wilson, anchorman

Monkey Man adds:

Bob Wilson – Ex Arsenal goalkeeper and TV pundit. Sometimes filled in to present when all the good ones where on holiday or ill.

Jim Rosenthal – He of ITV Sport fame (F1 coverage before Steve Rider jumped ship from BBC) and Jewish, hence the Wailing Wall reference. Clever that.

Half Man Half Biscuit
Half Hearted