Half Man Half Biscuit Half Hearted

Half Man Half Biscuit Half Hearted

Ah yes. Why spend time typing up the lyrics to Half Man Half Biscuit songs? Because they are gems like no other. We celebrate British bands and artists for seminal musical works (think Bowie or Elvis Costello) and, unless you happen to know the late John Peel's inside leg measurement or you were enlightened as a student, the majesty, wit and sheer intelligence of the HMHB opus is ignored. Shame, shame, shame.


Over the years a number of web sites have recorded some lyrics and a multitude of research notes for the songs [see the excellent www.hmhb.co.uk]. The latter are invaluable to understanding the wide ranging and often obscure historical references. The former are a mixed bag, with only a few songs listed.

So what started out as a full hearted attempt by me to record the lyrics so my sister could understand the songs has developed into a blog post and a project to educate the half-hearted masses and to provide a definitive song list with lyrics.

They'll be other crap on here too such as my own songs "Progressive Dads", "People called Wilson", "Blog-proof iPod", "Armchair Expert" and "Holistically Challenged"- I need to finish writing them first :)

"...Baby I'm from the Wirral Peninsula.
A merciless despot with nothing to lose"

Monkey Man, June 2007

Please note that all lyrics are mostly my interpretation and are presented here to assist you in understanding the songs. They are the copyright of others.

You should also pay a visit to www.chrisrand.com/hmhb/ for HMHB lyrics - a superb site with a superb range of listings

Thursday, 21 June 2007

Letters Sent [Achtung Bono]

Keeper you just made a decent save
So why do you feel the need to rant and rave
Screaming at defenders makes you look dead stupid
Especially when they haven't done much wrong
Please cease the trait

Thank you to who ever found my purse
Also when I fell the passing nurse
And when in my coma as I try to bludgeon
Chartist demonstrators in the square

Those on the ward
Yours much restored

I disagree entirely with your choice
Peetie Wheatstraw had a better voice
I'd like to warn your readers
Stapeley Water Gardens
A nice day out but best to take a flask

Dear Miss McVeigh it pains me to say
The school choir was dull and the blame lies with you

Sewage farm an absolute disgrace
Picnic tables somewhat out of place
Leisure Centre cash-point always out of order
And there's too much chlorine in the pool

Thirteen across
Where was the clue
Bird on the wire
Len your the dogs

Notes taken from www.hmhb.co.uk

Chartist Chartism was a popular movement in Great Britain from 1838 to 1848 for electoral and social reform. These days, there's the magazine 'Chartism: for democratic socialism'.
Peetie Wheatstraw Bluesman from the 1920s-1941. Read about him here.
Stapely Water Gardens Garden centre (and much more) near Nantwich in South Cheshire.
Bird On A Wire Leonard Cohen's anthem of personal redemption.
Len Leonard Cohen.

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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thankyou to whoever found my purse

11 November 2008 at 16:21
Anonymous said...

Thank you to who ever found my purse

(sorry, just re-read your version of the line)

11 November 2008 at 16:23

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